My Life with Point O Five

This project is now done

A lot of subjects I have run

And all of this was wrong

Since p equals just point one.

.

I test more people just like you

Who are Dutch and have a clue

There is this and more to do

But p only rises to point two.

.

So, I try to save some time

Reject outliers, that is fine

Stats together with some wine

And hop p is down to point O nine

.

Shall this now be my fate?

Get a result just second rate?

I give the data to a mate,

And hop, p is down to point O eight.

.

And then someone says to me

That more can be done with RT

After ROI’ing I see with glee

That p is down to point O three.

.

And so I feel like I’m in heaven

But a coding error I am havin’

Down I cry in my office at ‘leven

When p equals point O seven.

.

So, I try non-parametrics

You know the part of statistics

Where your results can get a fix

And hop p is down to point O six.

.

I nearly felt my feelings soar

If only I could do some more

There is here an effect for sure

Once p is down to point O four.

.

At this point I lose my drive

If only p would go down and dive

This project is no more alive

As p is greater than point O five.

.

This poem was written for the IMPRS (Nijmegen) Sinterklaas celebration.

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